Maybe you're searching among the branches for what only appears in the roots. Rumi

When I feel discontent I begin to dream and itch for the future for my blank slat. I create scenarios that could never exist! I search in the branches wanting more of the lush greenness, daring to create the excitement of spring with out going through the bleak winter.

Life cycles through so that we are reminded to stay grounded. New springs come after a time of deep nourishment. Remember that my life began as a seed. Remember that it is depth that allows me to stretch out into the sky, to shade the burnt and protect the weary birds.

I am currently in a winter, my season of bearing fruit has come to rest. Now I must root in the ground. I must expand in the richness of family, friendship, God and art so that in season my spring will come.

Where does your life root?

It had been a month since I posted... One month is a long time so what was my hang up? Lets see... I moved and that was all consuming from the time we decided to look until this week when we brought our last load of belonging up the three flights of stairs. I have been feeling run down and partially sick for at least 2 weeks. I hope this weekend is the end to that routine. Lastly this is the time of year where I grieve the loss of my father and mother. They passed away between Thanksgiving and Christmas so as the weather turns my mind gets distracted from the productive things I need to do and I just slow down. The other event in my live is November Write a Novel Month. So if I am quiet in my blog you know why.

Perhaps I will share my story, but please be kind I have never written a story before.

connections

Have you ever felt the calming touch of someone who cares? It may not be a hug, just the reassuring touch of another human on your arm, back, grabbing your hand. I have, and I try to extend this gift to others. I am an anxious person, at time anxiety has been the constant storm that guides all that I do. At night I have been known to become overwhelmed with fear of death. I can be convinced that I am having a stroke, I know that sounds crazy but it is the truth. My husband only needs to lay his hand on me and I will immediately calm down. (In his absence I will pet my dog)I do not understand the science of touch I just accept the calming gift of touch.

I have heard before that we need 5 hugs a day to be healthy. I have seen documentaries of children in Russia who were not touched as infants, these infants were shaking experienced "failure to thrive." For me that is science enough we NEED to be touched.

I grew up in a family that did not hug or touch very much. I was not by any means deprived as a baby and developed normally it is just that in my teenage and preteen years hugs were rare and made me uncomfortable. Affection is something that my friend and I showered on each other but not something practiced in the home. I know that at times I felt starved for affection *although I had no desire to receive that from my dad at home. I loved to cuddle up and watch a movie with friends. I remember watching movies with a good friend, Ben, and we would be cuddled and you would think we were a "couple" but we were just friends meeting a deep felt need to be close and loved. I am thankful my friends who met this deep need in my life and taught me how to give and accept affection.

Even if you think that you do not like affection and hugs remember that it is a human need to feel connected loved so offer your love and affection to those around you.